[gsd] shinn/stellar; the end (1/1)
fandom: Gundam SEEDestiny (anime)
pairing: Shinn/Stellar
rating: PG-13
genre: Angst
word count: 884
warnings: Slight profanity, character death.
disclaimer: Gundam SEEDestiny does not belong to me. (I wish I owned a Gundam…)
notes: In Shinn’s POV, but not 1st person. A different take on Stellar’s death.



The End


“Shinn… I love you…”


He held on.

Arms embracing the female figure, he positioned his chin on her head, and never wanted to let go.

Her face was stained with sticky trails of where the tears—both his and hers—had traced. She laid in his arms, with only a small breath of air escaping her lips every now and then. Her heartbeat was faint and slow, but he could feel it beating against his chest. He clung onto every last bit of hope that proved she was still alive.

Although many screams and explosions were in the atmosphere,
He could not hear anything.

And neither could she.

They were enveloped in a midst of silence.

Finding the tears in his eyes dry, he couldn’t cry anymore.

With his head hung low, dark velvet eyes shut, he held onto her even tighter, trying to erase the feelings that circulated through his entire body.


Fear; pain; anger; agony; hate; vengeance.


I will kill you.


He did not understand why it had to be like this. She did not do anything wrong, she deserved this fate the least. The ones that should die, don’t; the ones that shouldn’t die, do.

Destiny is cruel.

After resting his orbs for a few more seconds, he slowly lifted his eyelids, and soon, his head followed.

Dark bangs sheltered the rage hidden in his eyes.


Kira Yamato, I will fucking kill you.


Her heartbeat stopped.





Unlike yesterday, it was quiet.

Almost too quiet, and he didn’t like it.

He could not hear anything. Especially not the one thing he wanted to hear most. If they were not surrounded by silence, he could at least lie to himself, I can’t hear it because of the fucking noise, but things never went the way he wanted them to.

He couldn’t hear it.

Her heartbeat.


Because it’s not beating anymore.


His Impulse Gundam marched slowly into the lake, stopping once it reached the centre.

If only time would stop, he would stay with her forever.
If only he could protect her, it would not have ended like this.
If only this didn’t happen, she would not be dead.

If only.


He gazed down at her, brushing strands of golden locks away from her closed eyes. They were a dark ruby colour, he knew. She looked so peaceful. If not for the scratches on her face, it looked as if like she was simply sleeping. So serene, it didn’t seem possible.

His eyes were swollen and dry from the night before, he was worn-out, but he refused to rest. He refused to let her out of his sight.

Leaning down, he gently brushed his lips against hers, whispering faintly against them. They were rough. Dry and cracked, unlike the soft warm ones he remembers. They were so cold, and caused his lips to feel slightly numb.


Once the left arm of his mechanism lowered, the entrance to Impulse’s control system opened. The frosty breeze travelled inside, filling the negative space around them.

He stepped outside, carrying her with him.

She laid in his two arms, head back, body limp.


This mid-winter’s morning was bitter, colder than any other morning he had ever experienced, or maybe that was just his own illusion. Her body was cold against his, his breath obvious against the icy air as he exhaled, but hers was nonexistent. She didn’t breathe. She couldn’t breathe. Her body was the last fragment of her that remained, and he didn’t want to let it go.

But he had to.


He was afraid. He didn’t know what to do next—what was he supposed to do? When she was still there, it was never hard to answer a question like that, it was such a simple question, he wanted to be with her and protect her like he promised.


“I’m sorry,” he apologised regrettably, voice soft, slightly cracked.

I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you.

But now, there’s nothing to fear.


He kneeled down onto one leg before slipping her into the clear icy lake. He watched as she descended deeper and deeper down, her hair flowing upwards due to the water, framing her delicate face. He stared longingly at her, at the woman in front of him, the woman he loved, the one woman he’ll never be able to have. He didn’t understand, why did all his loved ones have to die?

Her figure was beginning to fade, and soon after, he couldn’t see her anymore.

A tear trickled down his face, much to his surprise. Weird, he thought he had already let out all his tears the night before.

And then he realised what it meant.


This was the end for them.


After the final tear dropped, he stood up, facing his Impulse, back against the lake. Rest in peace, Stellar.

He clenched his fists, gripping tightly onto the object in his palm. It was the light pink shell she had first gave to him, in which he made into a pendant and gave in return. It was the symbol of their beginning, as well as the symbol of their ending.

Without a second thought, he stepped into the cockpit.


Rage; anguish; fury; hatred; retribution.

It was all coming back to him.


I will avenge your death.

Because…

“I love you too, Stellar.”


fin.




Wow, I haven't written fanfics for the past three years! I actually started this in 2006, and only just finished it in the last two days. (Also fixing it and taking away weeaboo Japanese :3;) I had to re-watch Stellar's death scene again just to do so, bawww I cried :'| But it is a very beautiful scene and I love it to death ♥ (no pun intended).

Anyways, hope you liked it, and in case you didn't catch on, the last five words Shinn said were the ones he muttered into Stellar's lips as he kissed her. /sap

comments/concrit/feedback all appreciated!